The Brain Code

I am amazed at the power which can be yielded by the mind

I have the same mind, each day when I awake

I am influenced and sometimes changed by the environment

Yet, its core remains

My brain causes me to see different things and think different thoughts

I then react and communicate in different ways

How are you today?

I’m good

Hanging in there (but there’s little to grasp)

You don’t even want to know (got some bad news but you and I aren’t close enough for me to say)

Some days, I wake up with an acute expectation that something totally wonderful will happen that day

My belief in the coming pleasantness makes my heart joyful

I leap out of bed

Joy remains even when night falls and the ordinariness of the day continues

Nothing happened

Other days, when I awaken, I feel a heaviness

My feet seem shod in cement

Its source is unknown to me

I followed my same nighttime routine

I am always careful not to deviate from my routine

Lest I am doing or not doing something to somehow cause the heaviness to descend

No deviation, no misstep

Yet, the heaviness greets me as soon as I realize it is the dawn of a new day

Nothing happened

Even when the sun shines brightly

Even when good news comes

I feel the heaviness

It feels eerily similar to my toiling away in the factory years ago

Faced with an eight-hour shift in humid conditions

From midnight till eight am

Each step I took required super-human strength

I had big plans and so the weight, while heavy, was more easily borne

I did not know when it would end but took solace in knowing it would

There is no set pattern to help me determine whether I will face joy or heaviness

I have tried in vain for years to crack the code

My eyes open and my brain decides