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Support for Caretakers

On a recent live Fireside episode, I shared with Teresa that a robot was created in Switzerland which gestures like a human and can respond verbally. The robot has been named “Nadine” and can assume many caretaking duties. Best of all: She can work 24 hours a day.

Of course, there are pros and cons to consider when using robots as an alternative to perform tasks routinely handled exclusively by humans. However, the reality is that the US population is aging and there is a tremendous need for caretakers. According to the Mayo Clinic “As the population ages, more caregiving is being provided by people who aren't health care professionals. About 1 in 3 adults in the United States provides care to other adults as informal caregivers.”

The article continues by noting that “A caregiver is anyone who provides help to another person in need, such as an ill spouse or partner, a disabled child, or an aging relative. However, family members who are actively caring for an older adult often don't self-identify as a "caregiver." Recognizing this role can help caregivers receive the support they need.”

I read a newspaper article which highlighted the stories of three families who shared about events which they had experienced that made the need for caretaker services critical. One 43-year-old lady whose father was badly injured in an accident had to move her father in with her family and resign from her job to become his primary caretaker. Not only was the daughter overwhelmed physically and emotionally, but the family was also experiencing significant financial concerns caused by their new reality. The daughter’s story is not uncommon. Many baby boomers now find that they are the only option when their parents or other family members need care and are no longer able to live independently. The following information, found on the Mayo Clinic’s site ( may be useful should you currently act in that role or want to get better prepared should you need to fulfill that role in the future.

“Caregiving can have many rewards. For most caregivers, being there when a loved one needs you is a core value and something you wish to provide.

But a shift in roles and emotions is almost certain. It is natural to feel angry, frustrated, exhausted, alone or sad. Caregiver stress — the emotional and physical stress of caregiving — is common.

People who experience caregiver stress can be vulnerable to changes in their own health. Risk factors for caregiver stress include:

· Being female

· Having fewer years of formal education

· Living with the person you are caring for

· Social isolation

· Having depression

· Financial difficulties

· Higher number of hours spent caregiving

· Lack of coping skills and difficulty solving problems

· Lack of choice in being a caregiver

Signs of caregiver stress

As a caregiver, you may be so focused on your loved one that you don't realize that your own health and well-being are suffering. Watch for these signs of caregiver stress:

· Feeling overwhelmed or constantly worried

· Feeling tired often

· Getting too much sleep or not enough sleep

· Gaining or losing weight

· Becoming easily irritated or angry

· Losing interest in activities you used to enjoy

· Feeling sad

· Having frequent headaches, bodily pain or other physical problems

· Abusing alcohol or drugs, including prescription medications. Too much stress, especially over a long time, can harm your health. As a caregiver, you're more likely to experience symptoms of depression or anxiety. In addition, you may not get enough sleep or physical activity, or eat a balanced diet — which increases your risk of medical problems, such as heart disease and diabetes.

Strategies for dealing with caregiver stress

The emotional and physical demands involved with caregiving can strain even the most resilient person. That's why it's so important to take advantage of the many resources and tools available to help you provide care for your loved one. Remember, if you don't take care of yourself, you won't be able to care for anyone else.

To help manage caregiver stress:

· Accept help. Be prepared with a list of ways that others can help you, and let the helper choose what he or she would like to do. For instance, a friend may offer to take the person you care for on a walk a couple of times a week. Or a friend or family member may be able to run an errand, pick up your groceries or cook for you.

· Focus on what you are able to provide. It's normal to feel guilty sometimes but understand that no one is a "perfect" caregiver. Believe that you are doing the best you can and making the best decisions you can at any given time.

· Set realistic goals. Break large tasks into smaller steps that you can do one at a time. Prioritize, make lists and establish a daily routine. Begin to say no to requests that are draining, such as hosting holiday meals.

· Get connected. Find out about caregiving resources in your community. Many communities have classes specifically about the disease your loved one is facing. Caregiving services such as transportation, meal delivery or housekeeping may be available.

· Join a support group. A support group can provide validation and encouragement, as well as problem-solving strategies for difficult situations. People in support groups understand what you may be going through. A support group can also be a good place to create meaningful friendships.

· Seek social support. Make an effort to stay well-connected with family and friends who can offer nonjudgmental emotional support. Set aside time each week for connecting, even if it's just a walk with a friend.

· Set personal health goals. For example, set goals to establish a good sleep routine, find time to be physically active on most days of the week, eat a healthy diet and drink plenty of water.

Many caregivers have issues with sleeping. Not getting quality sleep over a long period of time can cause health issues. If you have trouble getting a good night's sleep, talk to your doctor.

· See your doctor. Get recommended vaccinations and screenings. Make sure to tell your doctor that you're a caregiver. Don't hesitate to mention any concerns or symptoms you have.

Respite care

It may be hard to imagine leaving your loved one in someone else's care, but taking a break can be one of the best things you do for yourself — as well as the person you're caring for. Most communities have some type of respite care available, such as:

· In-home respite. Health care aides come to your home to provide companionship, nursing services or both.

· Adult care centers and programs. Some centers provide care for both older adults and young children, and the two groups may spend time together.

· Short-term nursing homes. Some assisted living homes, memory care homes and nursing homes accept people needing care for short stays while caregivers are away.

If you're like many caregivers, you have a hard time asking for help. Unfortunately, this attitude can lead to feeling isolated, frustrated and even depressed.

Rather than struggling on your own, take advantage of local resources for caregivers. To get started, check out the Eldercare Locator or contact your local Area Agency on Aging (AAA) to learn about services in your community. You can find your local AAA online or in the government section of your telephone directory.”

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